Benshi bavuga ko niba ukunda bya nyabyo umukunzi wawe ari ngombwa kumufuhira kuko byerekana urukundo umufitiye. N’ubwo guhufa bibaho hagati y’abakundana, bigira ibibazo biteza bishobora no kwangiza umubano wabo.
Ibintu 5 bibi biterwa no guhuha bikabije mu bakundana:
1.Gutakarizwa icyizere: Akenshi umuntu ufuhirwa cyane agira ibitekerezo bitandukanye mu mutwe we bishobora no gutuma yibaza ko adakwiranye n’umukunzi we ku bwo kutamwizera agahora amugiraho urwikekwe akaba yanahitamo kuva mu rukundo ngo abashe kubona umutuzo.Gufuha rero ngo ni ngombwa mu rukundo ariko nabwo umuntu akabigenzura kandi akagerageza kuganira na mugenzi we amwumvisha ko atari ukumufuhira kuko amwanze ahubwo ari ukumuhangayikira kuko amukunda cyane kandi yumva amuhorana mu nshingano ze.
2.Gufuha bigaragaza kwikunda no kwiyemera: Gufuhira bikabije umukunzi wawe kugeza ha handi wumva wamuyobora muri byose kugeza no mu bitekerezo, aho utazongera kumuha n’umwanya ngo akubwire icyo atekereza ku ngingo runaka, ugasigara ari wowe umubwira ngo kora iki, iki kireke, we atigeze abaza umutimanama we, bigaragaza ko wikunda birenze urugero cyangwa ko uri n’umwiyemezi n’umunyagitugu mu rukundo, akenshi binamuha iyo shusho mu buzima bwawe busanzwe bwo hanze y’urukundo agahora akubonamo umunyagitugu kuko uhora umwereka inyota yo kumuyobora.
3.Gufuha bitera kubeshyana no guhishana
Urubuga Elcrema ruvuga ko akenshi abantu bafite indwara yo gufuha mu rukundo bahora baharanira gutekerereza abakunzi babo no kubafatira ibyemezo kandi ibi bibangamira urukundo. Mu rukundo habaho kubahana ku mpande zose no kungurana ibitekerezo mu kuri.Iyo ukundana n’umuntu umufuhira bikabije kugeza ubwo icyo akubwiye cyose ukimugayira bitewe n’uko atari wowe wamubwirije kugikora bigera aho yumva agiye kuzajya yikorera gahunda ze atanakubwiye cyangwa se yanakubwira ntakubwize ukuri kuri gahunda ze cyangwa akanazikubwira yazirangije.
Aha kandi haziramo no guhishanya mu rukundo bigatuma imico idakwiriye urukundo rw’ukuri igenda itera abakundana kumva urukundo rubabihiye bikarangira banaruvuyemo.
4.Gufuha bitera gucana inyuma no kubenga: Ubangamirwaga no gufuhirwa iyo agize amahirwe agahura n’undi umukunda atamufuhira ahita areka wa wundi wamufuhiraga rimwe na rimwe atanamubwiye.
5.Gufuha birema indi shusho kuwo ukunda
Iyo umwe mu bakundana afuhira mugenzi we aba amutera kubihirwa mu rukundo. Niba umukunzi wawe agira aho ajya ukamugenzura bikabije ndetse ukumva byakubujije amahoro umenye ko we atabyizera nk’urukundo gusa ahubwo afite ibindi bitekerezo byinshi biziramo:Urugero, ntanyizera, abona namuca inyuma, abona ndi mwiza cyane ku buryo atekereza ko abandi bamuntwara, azi ibyo ajya akora iyo aba yagiye ku buryo atekereza ko nanjye aribyo nakora.
Ni byiza ko niba ufuhira uwo ukunda ubyitwararika ndetse ukaba wanamufasha kumva ko ari uko umukunze ntutume abibonamo indi shusho kuko iyo warengereye akabibonamo kumugenzura cyane urukundo ruba ruri kuyoyoka.Gufuha ni imungu ikomeye ku rukundo nyakuri, ni ibintu byizana bishobora kugenzurwa hakaba n’ubwo birenga ubikora bigahinduka uburwayi.