Urukundo, ijambo ry’imigemo ine, rivugwa inshuro kuva kuri 348 kugera kuri 645 muri Bibiliya, bitewe n’iyo ari yo, dore ko zimaze kugwira mu moko menshi.Ni ijambo rituma umukobwa ava iwabo za Nyagatare dufatiye urugero ku Rwanda, agasanga umusore w’i Gisagara mu bilometero amagana, akarushyo ugasanga uwo musore abayeho mu buzima bubi ugereranyije n’iwabo, ariko kuko rwiswe impumyi, uwo mukobwa akabana na we muri ubwo buzima ntacyo yishinja.

Rutuma umusore w’umukire cyangwa umuherwe ufite imitungo rimwe na rimwe isabwa kubarwa na za mashini zigezweho, ajya gushaka wa mukobwa bamwe babona bakavuga ko “ubanza umuhungu wacu baramuroze,” ariko akabima amatwi akabana n’uwo yihebeye.Ni uko ruteye, ariko abahanga mu by’imibanire, imitekerereze n’ubundi bumenyi rusange bagaragaza ko atari ikintu cyo guterera aho gusa, ahubwo rubagarirwa, rukukirwa rwakura rukabungwabungwa, wa munyenga warwo ukagomeza gutyo mpaka mu busaza.Iyo bidakozwe ni ho tubona za gatanya zirenga ibihumbi 673 zibaho ku mwaka ku Isi. Mu Rwanda ho, raporo y’Urwego rw’Ubucamanza yerekana ko mu mwaka wa 2022/2023 inkiko z’u Rwanda zemeje agatanya za burundu 3075 zatanzwe ku bashakanye byemewe n’amategeko.Umuntu atandukana n’undi ari uko hari ibyo batumvikanaho, icyo gihe rwa rukundo ruba rwatangiye kuyonga nk’isabune, ari yo mpamvu izi ari ingingo abahanga bagaragaza ko ziramutse zikurikijwe rwasugira rugasagamba.

Guha igihe mugenzi wawe no kumwumva by’ako kanya : Umuhanga mu by’imitekerereze wo muri Leta Zunze Ubumwe za Amerika witwa Dr. Arthur Aron, uzwi mu bushakashatsi ku bakundanye, yerekanye ko igihe uha umukunzi wawe ari cyo gishobora kugena uko muzabana.

Ibi ntibivuze gusa kumarana igihe, ahubwo no kumuha umwanya ukamwitaho, ukirinda ibibatandukanya, mukaganira murebana, by’akarushyo ukumva intekerezo ze n’uko yiyumva. Iyo abakundana bahana umwanya utaziguye, urukundo rwabo rurakura, rugatuma n’iterambere ry’urugo ryiyongera.

Amagambo asubiza intege mu bugingo :Dr. Gary Chapman, umwanditsi wamenyekanye ku ndimi eshanu z’urukundo (The Five Love Languages), agaragaza ko amagambo meza, ashimangira urukundo, afasha kureshya umutima no gusubiza intege mu bugingo.
Ni ha handi umuntu abwira mugenzi we amagambo meza y’urukundo, akamwereka ko amufitiye agaciro, akamushimira ibyo akora, ndetse akamubwira uburyo amushimishije mu buzima bwe.

Abahanga bo muri Kaminuza ya Georgia bagaragaza ko abantu bahora bagaragarizanya urukundo binyuze mu magambo, baba bafite amahirwe menshi yo kugira urukundo ruramba.

Gukorerana uturimo : Iyo abakundana bafashanya mu mirimo ya buri munsi, bituma umubano wabo ukomera. Nta kintu gishimisha nk’umugabo utashye agasanga umugore we yamuteguriye amafunguro, cyangwa umugore usanga umugabo we yateguye ibyo kurya.Ubushakashatsi bw’umuhanga mu by’imitekerereze Shelly Gable bwerekanye ko ibikorwa byoroshye nk’ibyo, ari byo bifasha abakundana gukomeza kubana neza no kumva bafite agaciro.

Impano zitunguranye : Impano, nubwo yaba nto, ifite ubushobozi bwo gukomeza urukundo. Dr. Chapman asobanura ko impano ari imwe mu ndimi eshanu z’urukundo, kandi ko icyo igitekerezo ari cyo cy’ingenzi, atari igiciro cy’iyo mpano.Kumenya icyo mugenzi wawe akunda, ukagitunganya nk’impano, bituma yumva ko umwitayeho kandi ko umuzi neza.

Gukoranaho (bitagamije ubusambanyi) : Gukoranaho mu buryo butagambiriye imibonano mpuzabitsina bifasha gukomeza ubusabane n’urukundo hagati y’abakundana. Guhoberana, gufatana ibiganza cyangwa gusomana ku itama ni ibigaragaza ubushuti n’urukundo rufite isuku.Umuhanga wo muri Kaminuza ya Miami witwa Tiffany Field agaragaza ko gukoranaho bigabanya umunaniro, bigakuraho stress kandi bigatuma umuntu yishimira kubaho.

Itumanaho ritaziguye : Itumanaho ni inkingi y’ingenzi mu rukundo. Iyo abakundana bavugana neza, bakizerana kandi buri wese akavuga ibyo atekereza adatinya gucibwa intege, bituma umubano wabo urushaho gukomera. Ni ho usanga umukunzi wawe azi uko wiyumva, icyo urimo gukora, ndetse n’ibyagutera umunezero cyangwa agahinda. Ibi bituma mwubakana umubano wubakiye ku bwizerane n’ubwubahane.

Iyo izi ngingo zose zikurikijwe, urukundo ruba nk’igiti gifite imizi ikomeye ntiruhungabanywa n’imiyaga y’ibigeragezo, ahubwo rurerwa, rukagwira, rukaba urw’igihe kirekire.