Hari igihe abantu bibwira ko urukundo rubaho ari urw’akanya gato, abandi bakavuga ko rushaje cyangwa rutakibaho. Ariko nyamara, impamvu urukundo rutaramba si uko rutabaho, ahubwo kenshi ni ibintu dukora cyangwa tudakora bigatuma rudakomera. Ushobora kwibaza uti “Ese nakora iki ngo ndambane n’umukunzi wanjye?” Igisubizo ni uko birashoboka, ariko bisaba kwisuzuma no guhindura ingeso zimwe na zimwe.
Nk’uko byatangajwe n’igitangazamakuru Hindustan Times, hari imyitwarire abantu benshi bakora batabizi, ariko ikaba igira uruhare rukomeye mu gusenya urukundo. Dore zimwe mu ngeso ugomba kureka niba wifuza kugira urukundo ruhamye kandi rurambye:
1. Kutizera umukunzi wawe
Urukundo rutagira icyizere ni nk’inzu yubatswe ku musenyi. Gushaka kumenya buri kantu kose akora, kumuhigira ku mbuga nkoranyambaga, cyangwa kugira abo washyizeho ngo bagusubirire ibyo yakoze, byose bishobora kubangamira umubano. Icyiza ni ukumwizera, ukamuha umwanya wo kwisanzura, ukamenya ko kumukunda bivuze no kumugirira icyizere.
2. Kunenga cyangwa kwijujutira umukunzi wawe mu ruhame
Gutuka, kunenga cyangwa gusetsa ubusekwa umukunzi wawe imbere y’abandi, nubwo waba ubikora wishimye, bishobora kumubabaza bikomeye. Ibyanyu bigomba gukemurirwa hagati yanyu. Ntiwakwubaka urukundo ururambitse ku nenge n’amagambo y’umunyo atuma undi yumva adakunzwe.
3. Kwihugiraho no kudaha umwanya umukunzi wawe
Nubwo akazi, inshingano, n’ubuzima bwa buri munsi bifite agaciro, ntibikuraho ko umukunzi wawe akeneye umwanya wawe. Iyo uhora uhugiye mu bindi, bigira ingaruka ku mubano. Gushaka umwanya wo kuba hamwe, kuganira no kwita ku byishimo n’ibibazo by’umukunzi wawe, ni kimwe mu bintu bikomeza urukundo.
4. Guhora ku byuma by’ikoranabuhanga aho kuba hamwe mu buryo bufatika
Iyo muri kumwe ariko ugahora kuri telefoni cyangwa mudasobwa, uba utanga ubutumwa butari bwiza bwo kutita ku mubano. Umukunzi wawe akeneye ko umwumva, ko umureba mu maso, kandi ko umuha umwanya udafite igihunga. Hari igihe ugomba gushyira ikoranabuhanga ku ruhande ukibanda ku mubano wawe.
5. Kutitaho amarangamutima ye cyangwa kumuca intege
Niba umukunzi wawe akubwiye ikibazo afite, ntukagire ngo urakimwihoreye cyangwa ngo usubize ibintu uko wiboneye. Kumva, kwihanganira amarangamutima y’undi, no kumwereka ko umwitayeho, ni urufunguzo rw’urukundo rurambye. Irinde amagambo amubabaza cyangwa amuca intege, kandi igihe cyose uciye inka amabere, ntutinye gusaba imbabazi.
6. Guharira undi inshingano zose z’urukundo
Urukundo si umuntu umwe urwitaho undi ari nyamwigendaho. Ni inshingano y’abantu bombi, buri wese agira uruhare mu kurwubaka. Kwibagirwa gushimira cyangwa kuvuga “ndagukunda” kuko wumva bidakureba bishobora gutuma urukundo ruhinduka uburemere ku wundi.
Urukundo rurambye rusaba byinshi: icyizere, kubahana, kuvugana ukuri, kwihanganira intege nke za mugenzi wawe no gufata ibyemezo mufatanyije. Niba ushaka ko ibyanyu biramba, tangira ureke izi ngeso zica urukundo bucece, hanyuma wubake umubano ushingiye ku rukundo nyakuri.
