Si rimwe si kabiri ndetse ni kenshi uzumva inkuru zidasanzwe aho abakobwa batagira ingano bataka batakishwa no kuba baratawe n’abasore babasezeranyije urukundo, nyuma bakaba nk’uko umuntu anaga ingata amaze gutura umutwaro yari yikoreye. Ibi byabereye umukobwa umwe watanze ubuhamya, ihurizo rikomeye.
Ikinyamakuru kimwe cyibanda ku nkuru z’ubumenyamuntu cyaranditse kiti:“Buri mubano ugira ibyawo, ibyiza cyangwa ibibi. Hari ubwo umwe agira umujinya akananirwa kuwuyobora ukamufata mu maboko yawo, ukamuyobora kugeza ubwo yisanga yababaje uwo akunda akaba ari naho hava intambara no gutandukana”.
Ikindi kinyamakuru kitwa ‘Study.com’, cyaragize kiti: “Urukundo rw’abakiri bato, ruza vuba rugashashagirana ariko umunsi umwe nyuma yo kurunyanyagiza rukagenderako, rukamera nk’umuriro wamenwemo amazi”.
Ubusanzwe benshi mu bakundana bakiri mu myaka mito barakoreshwa cyane, ku buryo usanga umuntu afite imyaka mike yarababaye ku rwego rwo kuba yiyemerera ko atazongera gukundana, nyamara cyaricyo gihe cye.
Umunsi umwe, umukobwa witwa Karine yahuye na Pauline, baraganira narimo ntambuka numva ikiganiro cyabo.
Karine ati: “Mwana nakundanye n’umusore mfite imyaka 15 y’amavuko ndamukunda cyane mwimariramo, kuko nabonaga ampa buri kimwe ndetse akamenyera n’ibyo iwacu babaga batampaye. Nari umwana mu mutwe no mu myaka kuko urukundo namukundaga rwatumye amfatirana, nkajya ndyamana nawe buri munsi yansabye kujya kumusura iwe aho yabaga muri ‘Ghetto’.
Ndakubwiza ukuri ko kugeza ubu namaze kwangirika cyane, namaze gutakaza imbaraga nyinshi, ahari wasanga ntwite cyangwa nkaba ndwaye SIDA kuko uwo musore ntabwo narinzi iwabo cyangwa andi mateka ye byo kuba nari bumenye ko nta kindi kibazo afite.
Igisumba ibindi byose natakaje ubusugi bwanjye kuwo nari buzashake, naramubabaje. Mwana, urukundo rwaranyoboye rumfatiranye n’imyaka mike nari mfite none ubu ndi kwicuza, ndi mu mwijima ntaho kujya mfite”.
Pauline, yaramusubije ati: “Buriya ikintu cyishe isi by’umwihariko abana bakiri bato ni uburyo bose basigaye bumva bajya mu rukundo, kandi nyamara basigaje imyaka itari munsi ya 20 ngo bashake. Ese ubundi umwana nkawe wabonaga urwo rukundo uzarumaza iki? Ese wabonaga uzakundana n’uwo musore akakugira umugore we ryari? Ese ko yari agukubye mu myaka wumvaga ko agukunda koko? Kuki utigeze utekereza ko hari abandi afite kandi bangana, wowe ashaka kugukoresha? Bwira abandi nkawe bitonde”.
Karine n’amarira menshi yaragize ati: “Kuva kera nagiraga urukundo rwinshi kandi nkumva ko nkeneye umukunzi, gusa ubu menye ko imyaka 15 itari inyemerera kugira umukunzi ahubwo ko nishukaga. Yagombaga kunsambanya, ese ubundi kuki nemeye kandi nziko nkiri muto?”.
Mu magambo yuzuye impanuro kuri mugenzi we wari umaze gukomeretswa bikomeye, Pauline yafashe umwanya amubwira inkuru ye. Ati: “Urukundo ntabwo rugendera ku myaka ariko nanone reba uwo muntu ukubwira ngo aragukunda, urebe n’aho ari kukwinjiza ngo umusure, ni iwabo?
Ni munzu nzima se? Wagombaga kumenya agaciro kawe, ukamenya imyaka yawe ndetse ugasobanukirwa ko udakeneye umukunzi. Abandi bana b’abakobwa batarageza igihe cyo kurushinga nabo bigireho”.
Uretse Karine inkuru z’urukundo zashenguye abantu, gusa imizi yazo ni mu rukundo rudateguye kandi rufatiyeho.
Abahanga batandukanye bagaragaza ko urukundo rufite ikigero cy’imyaka rwagafatiyeho, ku buryo ujya mu rukundo agomba kuba afite ubushobozi buhagije bwo kurwanirira amarangamutima ye mugihe yababajwe ndetse akaba ageze mu myaka y’ubukure (+18).
Iyi nkuru ikozwe mu rwego rwo gutanga impanuro kubana bakiri bato baba abahungu n’abakobwa, bishora mu rukundo nyamara imyaka yabo ikiri mike. Ubutaha tuzibaza ngo mbese “Ni iyihe myaka yo gukundana?”
