Kubabarira no kwihanganirana ni ngombwa ku bakundana , ariko hari urugero imbabazi z’ abakundana zigomba kugarukiraho, cyane iyo umwe mu bakundana akosereza undi ukabona asa n’ ubikora ku bushake, Dore ibintu bitandatu udakwiye kwihanganira ku mukunzi wawe niba ushaka ko muzarambana:
1. Niba umukunzi wawe umukorera ibiri ngombwa byose biranga abakundana, ukamwubaha, ukamwumva vuba, ukamugira inama, ukamufasha mu bibazo, ukamuha igihe, ukamuha impano, ukamusohokana naho we ukabona ibyo byose umukorera ntacyo bimubwiye ndetse ntazagire n’umunsi umwe ubona yibwirije gukora na kimwe muri ibyo kandi azi ko ubikunda, wanabimusaba akabyanga kandi ukumva ubangamiwe no kuba atabikora, uzafate umwanzuro ukwiye, ushake uzajya abigukorera.
2. Iyo umukunzi wawe nta kintu kizima mujya muganira akaba adashaka kukubwira ibye kandi mukundana, akaba adashaka kukwereka umuryango n’inshuti, akaguha amategeko ngenderwaho yo kumuhamagara no guhura nawe kandi nta mpamvu ifatika y’ayo mategeko, akakubwira nabi buri gihe uko muvuganye rimwe na rimwe akanagutuka. Ibyo si ibyo kwihanganira ahubwo jya wibaza noneho nimubana ibyo azagukorera,maze uvanemo akawe karenge hakiri kare.
3. Umukunzi ushaka kuguhindura ku ngufu kandi akagufuhira bikabije,agashaka kugucaho incuti zose zaba abakobwa n’abahungu mwari musanzwe muziranye, yaguhamagara akakubura kuri telefoni intambara ikarota,ugasanga akubaza abantu muvugana n’ibyo muba muvugana,akanga ko unisobanura ngo agutege amatwi, anumve niba umubwiza ukuri cyangwa umubeshya.Ibi nabyo ntuzashake kubigumamo ejo yanagukubita kubera kugufuhira no kutumvira amtegeko ye ngo uhinduke uko ashaka.
4. Iyo umukunzi wawe atereta abandi kandi ari wowe mwemeranijwe kubana akabikora mu ibanga cyangwa unabizi,wamubaza ntagusubize ahubwo akakurusha uburakari rimwe na rimwe akanaguhakanira ko atazabareka mutarabana kuko hari abasore bakiyumvisha ko bazareka gutereta mumaze kubana ariko nyamara aba akubeshya kuko niba bimunaniye akiguharaye mutarabana nurugeramo noneho azakora ibirenze kandi ntacyo wakora,ibyiza wamureka hakiri kare kugira ngo utazicwa n’agahinda.
5. Ibindi utazihanganira ni ibinyoma bikabije,ugasanga umukunzi wawe akunda kubeshya cyane, aguha amasezerano ntayasohoze,akakwiyemeraho cyane akakwizeza ibitangaza ntuzagire na kimwe umubonaho,nta cyizere ugomba kumugirira kuko no gufata umwanzuro wo kubana biba biri kure ndetse akenshi aba agutesha igihe,kandi burya munabanye wazasanga ari bihemu.
6. Ntuzihanganire na rimwe umukunzi uhora akubabaza aho kugushimisha, igihe kinini mugahora mwashwanye mupfa ibintu by’amafuti kandi akenshi ariwe biturutseho, uzamureke utaroye inyuma, nta munezero aba azaguha nubundi mu buzima bwawe n’iyo mwabana.
Ngibi ibintu utagomba kwihanganira k’uwo mukundana, igihe cyose ubona abikora nkana kandi azi neza ko bikubabaza ariko ukabona umubabaro wawe ariwo munezero we. Ntuzamwizirikeho kuko iyo abigukorera mutarabana aba azakaza umurego noneho mwaramaze kubana.