Ariko ubanza yishakira kuryamana nanjye gusa?Ntamwanya mfite wo kuvugana n’ abasore b’ abacanzi? Nubwo ari amakosa yawe kuba ntamukunzi ufite , ukaba ukiri wenyine mu myaka ufite kandi wari kuba ufite umukunzi , gutereta ni iyindi ntambwe kandi gukomeza utekereza ko abasore batakwitayeho , ntibizasiba icyuho wifitemo.
Ubyemere cyangwa rwose ubihakane, imwe mu myitwarire yawe , imyemerere cyangwa imiterere yawe bishobora kuba bituma ntamusore ukuvugisha ndetse n’ abasore uvugishije bakakwirengagiza, ugasanga ubuze ntuwakwaka numero yawe ya telefone.
Dore rero bimwe mu bimenyetso bituma umutima wawe ubamo icyuho ibihe byose warabuze umusore waza kukubaza akazina:
1.Ntakizere ugirira igitsina gabo:“Arambwiye arankunda, ariko ubanza yishakira kuryamana najye gusa.’’ ‘’Ntamwanya mfite wo kuvugana n’abasore b’abacanzi.” “Nihagira undi musore umbeshya cyangwa umpemukira mubuzima, ndahiriye imbere y’Imana n’abantu, sinzongera kujya mu rukundo na rimwe, nta na sms imbaza iby’urukundo nzongera gusubiza, yewe nta n’undi musore nzasubira guha numero ya telefone yajye.” “Uyu musore narinziko ankunda by’ukuri ntaziko yishakira ko turyamana gusa, none turaryamanye, aranyanze. Abasore bose nicyo baba bishakira, uyu nawe n’ampemukira, ntawundi nzongera gukunda.” Sinitaye kubuzima mu rukundo wagize mbere, cyangwa izindi nzira waciyemo zatumye uta ikizere k’ubasore cyangwa abagabo, ese wigeze utekerezako kwibaza bene ibyo bibazo aribyo biguha kw’ibere umwamikazi wo kugumirwa ? Ntugatekerezeko umusore wese uje kukuvugisha ashaka ko muryamana gusa (cyangwa ko ntakiza na kimwe cyaboneka mugihe mwaba muryamanye). Haracyariho abasore beza benshi cyane. Bashobora kuba bake, cyangwa ntibabe abo mwegeranye, ariko barahari, ibi ntibyatuma uhitamo kugumirwa burundu. Hereza umwe umwanya mumutima wawe, akwereke ko wibeshye.
2.Ufite imyitwarire idahwitse: Kuba indashima ni ryo zina rikuranga. Guca abandi intege bikuri mumaraso, kandi gusubiza ibitekerezo bya bagenzi bawe inyuma nicyo kikwiberamo. Ibi ubikora kandi no mu ruhame, kuko wumva ariko uteye muri wowe.
Nubwo ushimishwa no kwigaragaza utihishiye mu ruhame ndetse no muri bagenzi bawe, ni byiza ko utabeshya. Ariko wibuke ko iyo mico nk’iyo hari abasore benshi batazayikunda, kuko baba bifuza gukundana n’umuntu uzabafasha gutera imbere mubitekerezo, badakeneye uzabasubiza inyuma cyangwa uzabadindiza mu mibereho yabo.
Ni byiza cyane gukomeza utekerezako kubaho mumyitwarire wowe ikunezeza, ariko umenyeko n’ubundi atari wowe wireba. Numara igihe cyawe uca abandi mu ijambo, ubasamira hejuru, urabona hari umusore uzakunda iyo mico yawe ? uzaguma wenyine kugeza igihe uzahindukira.
3.Ntabushuti ushaka kugirana n’ abantu:Ukaba ufite akazi, ukumvako umusore wese uje kukuvugisha aruko akubonanye amafaranga utunze cyangwa ibyo utunze. Igihe cyawe ukimara wibwirako umusore wese wakuvugisha aruko yaba ashaka ibyo utunze, inzu nziza umaze kugura, amashuri menshi umaze kwiga, amafaranga utunze, akazi ufite, umuryango uturukamo ukize, ….. n’ibindi n’ibindi byinshi cyane.
Mu gihe ubitekereza utyo, ngo utegereje umusore uzaba uri kukigero nk’icyo uriho cyangwa ukuri hejuru mu bushobozi ufite, komereza aho utegereze, nibikunda amahirwe azakuzira umubone.
Gusa ukwiye gutekerezako abo uri guhakanira, uri kwangira batazagaruka mu buzima bwawe. Ibi bishobora gutuma wisanga ugejeje mu myaka y’ubukure utarabona umusore.
Niba ufite amafaranga, ukaba utabwira umusore ngo mujye gusangira, uratekereza muzahuza mute? Ubushuti bwanyu buzubakira kuki? Niba ufite ubushobozi, shaka inshuti, mugirane ubushuti bukomeye, inshuti zizatuma umenyana n’izindi nshuti. Ibi bizatuma ushobora kubona umukunzi.
4.Ntamuntu ukunogeye:Umukobwa akicara nijoro agakora urutonde rw’ibyo umusore yakemera yaba yujuje. Ati, agomba kuba afite metero 1.8, agomba kuba afite six pack, aturuka mumuryango ukize kandi afite akazi kamwinjiriza, agaragara neza, yambara style zigezweho, … urutonde rugakomeza ye! None umusore nkuwo uzamukura he? Uzamwiremera? Ubuhanga buvugako ugomba gufata urutonde rw’ibintu 5 bidahinduka, kandi nubwo waba uteganya kubona 3. (kandi nyine, uwujuje 3 muri 5 wahisemo, biba ari byinshi, kuko abayujuje ibyo ukeneye kuri 60%). Aba ari muri Pass.
Ntabwo rero uzashaka gufata abasore bose ngo abashyire mumusore umwe. Nuzisanga urimo uhakanira abasore ngo ntibujuje ibyo ukeneye, ku rutonde rw’ibyo wihaye umusore yagakwiye kuba yujuje, ugomba kumva ko uzabaho ntamukunzi. Niba ubikora utyo, komeza wibere wenyine ibihe byose.
5.Utinya kujya murukundo:Abakobwa benshi kuva bakivuka, bavukana umuco ko abasore aribo bazaza kubashaka, ko bazabasanga munzu iwabo baje kubareba, ntabwo aruko bidashoboka ko nawe watera intambwe usanga uwo mwakundana.
Abasore sibo baba batinyutse bonyine kuba bakegera umukobwa kumubwirako bamukunze. Igitsina gore kiva mu Rukundo kubera impamvu nyinshi cyane – gutinya ko bagira amahitamo mabi (ugakomeza ngo utegereje uwujuje uru rutonde), gutinya kumvako baboshywe n’urukundo, gutinyako yabura ibyishimo mugihe yashwana n’uwo bakundana.
(Bamwe bakibaza uburyo ngo bashobora kuzabana n’umugabo umwe igihe cyose, mugihe aba yifuza guhinduranya abasore mu buriri. Gusa gutekerea utya nibyo bizatuma ugumirwa burundu.) Ushobora kuba wiyumva ukunze, ariko ukumva uratinya ngo waba uzatakaza igihe kirekire nawe kandi wumva utabyumva neza.
Mu gihe umusore akubwiye nk’imigambi afite, ibyo ateganya kuzakora, ndetse n’ibyo aguteganyiriza, ugatekereza ngo ari kwirarira, nuko ukabipinga. Uri gushaka ibyo nawe udakora muri wowe nawe ubwawe.