Nukuri ntabwo ari bishyashya ko abagabo bubatse, cyane cyane abo i Lagos, bakomeje kugirana umubano w’urukundo no guhuza ibitsina n’abakobwa bato bakiri abaselibateri. Ariko, mugihe byahoze byunvikana bisa nk’aho aba bagabo bubatse baba bashutse abakobwa bakiri batto mu bucuti, ibintu bisa nk’aho byahindutse.
Abakobwa benshi batarashyingirwa bigaragara ko barimo gukururwa n’abagabo bubatse, kandi babigambiriye kubashaka babareshya.
Kubireba, mu gihe cyiminsi irenga irindwi ku mpuguke mu by’imibanire uzwi cyane, mu nkuru za Joro Olumofin kuri Instagram hashize amezi macye, hari raporo na raporo zasohotse, konti z’abantu ku giti cyabo zishimangira ibi bikorwa no kwerekana uburyo bisa nkaho ari ‘intego’. ku bakobwa bato, bakiri abaseribateri, kujya mu rukundo n’abagabo bubatse bitandukanye no gukundana n’umuntu utarashaka ukiri muto nkabo.
Kuki abagore b’abaseribateri bakundana n’abagabo bubatse
Impamvu ya mbere igaragara ituma iyi mibanire isa nkaho itera imbere mu buryo bwumvikana igomba kuba ku bw’inyungu zamafaranga zijyanye n’ibi bibazo by’urukundo.
Umukoresha wa Instagram asangiza ubunararibonye bwe ku rukuta rwa Instagram rwa Joro mu gihe cyavuzwe haruguru. Kuba ingaragu kandi adashobora kubona abakobwa abo aribo bose nubwo yagerageje inshuro nyinshi, rimwe yabonye impeta nuko ayishyira ku rutoki rwe. Kimwe n’ubumaji, kuva icyo gihe abakobwa baramwegereye ndetse batangira no kumwemerera imibonano mpuzabitsina bihendutse nk’uko wabitekereza. Uyu musore atarivuze amazina yagize ati:
“…Iyo mpeta y’ubukwe isobanura intsinzi n’umutekano abo bakobwa bo muri Nigeria b’abanebwe bakunda.”
Aha niba uyu musore yarabaye inyangamugayo 100% avugisha ukuri, n’ikindi kintu wakwibaza.
Gusa ikigaragara hano, ku bagore benshi bakundana nkana n’abagabo bubatse, nuko abasore bo mu myaka yabo baba batarashobora kugera ku rwego rwo kwihagararaho bityo bikabagora kuba bakuzuza ibyo basabwa kugirango babone uko bashimisha abo bakobwa.
Ariko tekereza neza, ninde ufite ibirenze bihagije bishobora gutera inkunga ingendo, imyenda ihenze cyane nibindi bice byose by’ubuzima bwiza abo bakobwa baba bashaka? Gukenera rero kubaho ubuzima buhenze utitaye ku bukungu buke ni imwe mu mpamvu zibitera.
Indi mpamvu yabyo ishobora kuba ubwigenge; kwidegembya kwishimira ibinezeza by’imibonano mpuzabitsina n’ibindi byose binezeza umubano ariko bitagusabye kuba mu bucuti.
Dairo, umufotozi i Lagos agira ati: “Nzi uruhinja rukundana n’umugabo washatse kubera igitsina gusa.”
Avuga ko adashaka kwizirika ku bakunzi basanzwe n’ibyo bikunze kuzana. Arashaka gukomeza ibirori no kubaho nkuko abona bikwiye kandi bidahinduka kandi atiriwe yunama kugirango yakire umusore runaka mubuzima bwe, ati:
Barahura, bagakora urukundo, bagatemberana gato, bayobya hirya no hino, baseka; nyuma yaho umugabo wubatse asubira mu rugo mu muryango we, maze umukobwa nawe agasubira mu buzima bwe akunda bwo kuba umuseribateri.
Ntekereza ko, nka we, abakobwa benshi bifuza inyungu zombi zo kuba mu rukundo n’ubwigenge; ikintu gishobora kugorana n’umukunzi cyangwa undi musore umwe rukumbi ushobora gutangira kugotwa n’ibyiyumvo nyuma y’igihe gito muzaba mumaze gukora urukundo.
Ugereranyije, kutabiyumvamo cyane abagabo benshi bubatse bakunze kugira kuri abo bakobwa bo kuruhande birabatunganira cyane kandi bituma bagira ubwo bwigenge Dairo avuga.
Ayo, umukunzi wishimisha, we avuga ko hariho imyizerere mu bagore ko abagabo bubatse, kubera uburambe, bazi gufata abagore neza. Kubandi bakobwa bamwe, iyi niyo ngingo ibakurura mu gukunda abagabo bubatse..
Kuba yarabanye n’umugore wubatse igihe kitari gito, kandi kuba umugabo urengeje imyaka mirongo itatu n’ukuze cyane byamushoboza kuba afite ubukungu akana n’inararibonye cyane mu kwita ku bagore n’umubiri wabo neza bakishima cyane.
Gukundana n’abagabo bubatse ni bibi
Impamvu zo gukundana n’abashyingiranywe, nubwo zakumvikana gute kubazemera ziracyariho, ariko ntizihagije na mba kugirango zibe zakwemeza umuco wo gukundana n’umugabo w’undi. Kandi na none ntibishobora kuba nk’urwitwazo ku bagabo bubatse bashaka guca inyuma abagore babo,
Bamwe bashobora kuvuga ko karma izagaragara ku muryango wawe nyuma mu buzima, ariko niba ikora cyangwa itabikora n’ikintu 50-50. Hagati aho naho, rwana n’intambara y’umutimanama wawe.
Umwanditsi mukuru wa Kglnews.com Nshimiyimana Francois