Mu rukundo, hari igihe haba kubengana, aho umwe mu bakundana afata icyemezo cyo gutandukana. Ubushakashatsi butandukanye bwerekana ko mu nkundo nyinshi, abakobwa ari bo bakunze kubenga abasore. Ibi bivuze ko intambwe ya mbere yo gutandukana akenshi itera imbere ku ruhande rw’abakobwa. Nubwo ibi bidakorwa n’abakobwa bose, birakunze kubaho cyane.
Inshuro umukobwa akunda by’ukuri
Ubushakashatsi bwagaragaje ko umukobwa ashobora kugira inshuro zirindwi z’urukundo rwa nyarwo mu buzima bwe. Ibyo bivuze ko urukundo rwa nyuma ya ziriya nshuro nyinshi rushobora kuba rutarimo umusingi ukomeye, ahubwo rushingiye ku buryo bworoheje nk’umusenyi.
Ingaruka zituruka ku kubenga kenshi
Abahanga bagaragaza ko kubenga kenshi bishobora kugira ingaruka ku mukobwa, haba mu bijyanye n’urukundo no mu buzima busanzwe. Dore zimwe mu ngaruka zigaragara:
1. Kubura umugabo
Abakobwa bakunze kubenga abasore bakurikirana, rimwe na rimwe bashobora gutinda kubona abagabo. Akenshi, babona abasore babatereta nk’abo batari ku rwego rwabo, nyamara na bo bifuza abo batashobora kugeraho.
2. Gushaka umugabo udashoboye kumushimisha
Umugani w’ikinyarwanda uravuga ngo “Utinda mu nyama ugacyura amagufwa” cyangwa “Wanga icumi ugatora bitanu”. Umukobwa ushobora gukomeza kubenga, ashobora kurangiza afashe icyemezo cyo gushakana n’uwo abonye, kubera kubura amahitamo meza.
3. Kwicuza
Hari igihe umukobwa abenga umusore kubera ko atari afite ubutunzi cyangwa ibindi bintu bifatika. Ariko nyuma, uwo musore ashobora kugera ku rwego rwisumbuye mu buzima, wa mukobwa akazicuza impamvu yamubenze.
4. Kudahirwa mu rukundo
Abakobwa bakunda kubenga usanga rimwe na rimwe na bo batagirira amahirwe mu rukundo. Abo bakunda ntibakunze kugira urukundo rufatika, akenshi kubera ko abo bakunda baba batabashoboye mu byifuzo byabo.
5. Gutinda kubona umugabo
Kubenga kenshi bituma umukobwa adahita abona umugabo vuba. Aba yumva ko akiri gutegereza umuntu utandukanye kandi utaraza, bigatuma asigara igihe kinini atarashaka.
6. Igitutu cy’ababyeyi
Kubenga kenshi bishobora gutera stress ku babyeyi b’umukobwa, bakamushyiraho igitutu cyo gushaka. Ibi bikunze kubaho cyane cyane iyo umukobwa ageze mu kigero kimaze gutera impungenge ku muryango, ariko we ntawe afite wifuza gushaka.Kubenga si bibi igihe impamvu zibiteye ari izifatika, ariko gukabya gushaka ko byose biba mu buryo bwuzuye bishobora gutuma umukobwa yisanga mu bibazo by’imibanire cyangwa ubuzima bwe muri rusange. Ni ngombwa guhitamo neza ariko no kwirinda gutinda cyane ku byifuzo bishobora gutuma habaho gutakaza amahirwe meza.